Follow-Up

Some of you might be worried about me since my last post so I would like to give an update on my white blood cell count- It is back to a somewhat "normal" or acceptable level.

Instead of waiting another two months, I had to go back to the the doctor for a follow-up visit in a week. He was pleased, as was I! It was a very, very long week of waiting and wondering. I tried not to let it get me down and although I wasn't planning on thinking about it all the time but no matter what I was doing, it was always in the back of my mind. My amazing Craig tried to help by asking all of his club members who had any experience with cancer or lymphoma about having a low white count and he kept trying to reassure me that it was a normal thing to happen and not to worry. I think being reassured by his members helps him as much as it helps me!

I hate having negative feelings. I feel they can become too detrimental to my health and healing but sometimes, in a situation like this, they are unavoidable. I was reassured about this by my dear friend Sharon while we were away with her and her husband last weekend. She told me that after what I had been through in such a short period of time, I was entitled my feelings. It's hard to stay so positive all the time. . .

And when all else fails, some song comes on the radio that helps with your doubts. Craig and I were in the car and the doubts were in the back of my mind when two songs came on the radio back to back. The first, "Hold On" by Michael Buble. It basically said that the two of us would get through it together (I'm paraphrasing). The second, "Live Like You're Dying", by Tim McGraw.

So, there you have it. Live.

Maintenance

Well, it was time for my first "tune-up" as Nurse Sheila calls it. I was heading in with a little trepidation. I wasn't looking forward to being "stuck" in the port again. It's amazing how you can get so used to being stuck every week but when you have two months off, it's like starting over again.

We were a little late getting there due to an empty gas tank. Then the blood work took a long time to get back from the lab. The news was not great-my white count was very, very low. Lindsey was my escort for the day and her ears perked up and I'm sure her heart started to race. We both asked Dr. Schwartz "Why?" and "What would cause this to happen?" He said he wasn't really sure and asked a lot of questions as to any symptoms I might have had like night sweats (often) aches and pains (of course) and still wasn't sure. When he mentioned the possibility of another bone marrow test my heart sank. I just had a clear pet scan, for crying out loud!!!

He decided to send me for the "tune-up" because it couldn't hurt-it could only help, particularly with the terrible bone pain and aches I was having. (I felt like I was 90 years old on some days!) Of course, they were running behind over at infusion so we had to wait. It is, unfortunately, a very busy place and there were no empty chairs! Nurse Naomi finally called me in and we settled in for the three hour treatment, armed with our I-Pads to help pass the time.

Put in a holding pattern again due to my low white count, (they needed verbal approval from the doctor), my friend Fran, the most amazing volunteer, brought me a cup of tea and we caught up on the last two months. She is truly amazing and so much fun to talk to.

We finally got the ball rolling and the infusion dripping. I took a little snooze, (due to the benadryl in the drip), Lisa came by to visit, and after five very long hours, we were on our way home! Honestly, it could have been a lot worse if the staff at PBCI weren't so amazing!

Life Goes On

It's been a busy two months since my petscan. I've had a great time catching up on my travel and have  been to Tallahassee, Orlando, Key Largo and New York. Being able to spend time with family and friends and celebrate life has been amazing!

My friends from school had a happy hour for me to celebrate being healthy and I was so surprised to see how many people showed up. It touched me deeply and warmed my heart. It was even more special because Lindsey was with me!

I also attended the Little Smiles Stars Ball with Lindsey as my date. This event is a very special party for children with cancer and life threatening diseases. These children have been my inspiration throughout my ordeal. I always reminded myself that if the kids could fight with dignity and strength so could I. To see these children all dressed up-smiling, dancing and happy to be alive was one of the most touching thing I have ever witnessed and experienced. I know Lindsey felt the same way. These children truly help to put life in a new perspective.

Cherish it!